I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
