So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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