Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i barfeds in our rink
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
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