You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
