Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
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I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
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I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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