I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
