If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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