Having a random hookup so left but love u
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize