Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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