So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
