sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize