Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
