i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize