I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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