That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
