what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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