I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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