This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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