The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
