The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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