Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(602): View more from Arizona

Goodnight sugar queer

(480): View more from Arizona

Sugar queer??

(602): View more from Arizona

Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?

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(602): Goodnight sugar queer (480): Sugar queer?? (602): Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'? http://tfl.nu/rsho

Replies (17) Good night (1566) Bad night (1984)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.

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(336): I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort. http://tfl.nu/myrl

Replies (11) Good night (589) Bad night (2624)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches

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(337): we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches http://tfl.nu/7vm5

Replies (15) Good night (3864) Bad night (484)
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(706): View more from Georgia

I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.

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(706): I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor. http://tfl.nu/s5q7

Replies (21) Good night (2056) Bad night (4391)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...

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(603): I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me... http://tfl.nu/t4o6

Replies (22) Good night (1180) Bad night (3782)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk

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(715): its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk http://tfl.nu/cy8n

Replies (8) Good night (3911) Bad night (952)
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(516): View more from New York

Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch

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(516): Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch http://tfl.nu/s2ci

Replies (10) Good night (4503) Bad night (750)
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(214): View more from Texas

Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?

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(214): Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this? http://tfl.nu/6xbx

Replies (7) Good night (1671) Bad night (988)
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(361): View more from Texas

Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.

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(361): Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin. http://tfl.nu/3skp

Replies (2) Good night (1819) Bad night (1040)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well

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(773): Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well http://tfl.nu/o41u

Replies (4) Good night (493) Bad night (1169)
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(787): View more from Puerto Rico

I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.

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(787): I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth. http://tfl.nu/to4d

Replies (5) Good night (837) Bad night (1020)
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(954): View more from Florida

in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.

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(954): in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine. http://tfl.nu/pi7u

Replies (2) Good night (818) Bad night (334)
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(816): View more from Missouri

Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.

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(816): Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on. http://tfl.nu/u2o1

Replies (13) Good night (1894) Bad night (423)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...

(843): View more from South Carolina

Happy Fourth.

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(843): I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night... (843): Happy Fourth. http://tfl.nu/0uin

Replies (0) Good night (457) Bad night (182)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through

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(401): you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through http://tfl.nu/dquz

Replies (0) Good night (413) Bad night (205)

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