covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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