I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize