I molested 6 butterflies tonight
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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