In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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