i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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