it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
