You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize