Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize