Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
how does that bad decision feel?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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