id be glad to
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
