did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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