Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
