I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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