We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
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