I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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