you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
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I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
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I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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