We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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