I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
