idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
there is glitter all over my balls
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