Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize