Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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