let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
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T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
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well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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