All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize