I need help removing her.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
