I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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