You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
