It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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