Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
