I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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