come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
