just come out here and I will go home with you...
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Randomize
